Do Women Prefer Their Sex Toys (Dildos) Larger Than Their Partner’s?

By Edie / September 23, 2020

“Do women prefer their sex toys (dildos) bigger than their partner’s?” is a question that is always posed by men.

The reason for this, outside of normal male curiosity, is that many men are unhappy and self-conscious about the size of their penis.

However, in most cases, men need not fret about having a small penis because we women just aren’t that shallow.

And, I have proof of that in a medical study I have found, and will discuss those findings further below.

Words and Punctuation Matter

Do women prefer their sex toys (dildos) larger that their partner? Photo of a human like figure holding an exclamation point.
Words and punctuation matter

But I would be doing myself and my readers an enormous disservice if I didn’t discuss what is wrong with this question structurally and why punctuation and proper English are important. You see, the question was originally written as:

“Do women prefer their sex toys (dildos) larger than their partner?”

Well, personally, if I even saw a big dildo larger than my partner (5’9” tall with a 42” girth), I would run for my life. Well, only after standing and marveling at the sheer size of the dildo beast and pondering who created such a gargantuan dildo and why.

So, I added the apostrophe and the “s” to make the question a bit more grammatically correct. Although, Google needs these questions to be precise as they are asked in order to rank. However, the mere addition of the “’s” still can be construed in a funny way.

Honestly, my partner and I have never compared the size of our dildos. And, if his dildo is bigger than mine, we may have some things to talk about.

Let’s Answer the Question

Do women prefer their sex toys (dildos) larger than their partner? Photo of 3 sizes and colors of Uberrime Hand crafted dildos.
Uberrime Hand crafted dildos

In all seriousness, some answers to the question, “Do women prefer their sex toys (dildos) larger than their partners?” were humorous and I have included snippets below. But all-in-all, I was able to find some fantastic answers to share with you. And to you men, please read on, because the answers aren’t at all what you might be expecting.

Do Women Prefer Their Sex Toys (Dildos) Larger Than Their Partners?

So, do women prefer their dildos larger than their partners? As a woman, I feel I am perfectly qualified to answer this question. Additionally, as a highly regarded sex toy professional, I have a great deal more insight to offer. Let’s start off with my answer as a woman.

Do I prefer my sex toys bigger than my partner’s? That depends entirely on my partner. For instance, I have been with men who were considered below average in size, men who were average in size, and that one guy that nearly ripped me in half.

Do women prefer their sex toys (dildos) larger than their partner? Photo of Lifelike Lover Luxe Realistic Silicone Dildo 6 Inch
Lifelike Lover Luxe Realistic Silicone Dildo 6 Inch

So, I cannot possibly compare my dildo size preference to penis size. Rather, I will say that I prefer my dildo size to be average, about 6 inches in length, and maybe equally as girthy. However, it’s much more difficult for me to climax with a sex toy than it is when being with the real thing, regardless of his penis size.

As a professional that sold sex toys for more than a decade, I can say that most women prefer average-size dildos. To be more clear, I carried this huge, realistic-looking dildo that was roughly 10 inches in length and so thick that I couldn’t get my small hand around it. And, as much as the ladies loved playing with this huge dong, I only sold 1.

And that was to a woman in her 60s who had lost her husband 2 years prior and the dildo reminded her of him.

That being said, let’s take a look at what others are saying about the question “Do women prefer their sex toys (dildos) larger than their partner?”

What People are Saying

When asked, “Do women prefer their sex toys (dildos) larger than their partners?” Katie answered:

“The biggest woman I ever had sex with was five foot eleven inches tall. I can’t imagine what I would do with a six-foot dildo. *

I prefer dildos that fit nicely inside my vagina. Full, but not painful, right there in that sweet spot. The size of my partners has nothing to do with it.

*Upon further reflection, I underestimated my imagination. I know exactly what I’d do with a six-foot purple dildo (Hey, if I have a six-foot dildo, you bet it will be purple, with glitter.)

A six-foot purple dildo with glitter and flashing LEDs would make an incredible flag pole. Imagine it mounted on my roof, a huge pride flag blowing in the wind above an American flag. I can just see all my neighbors “taking a knee” every morning when they see it.”

I love Katie’s sense of humor as it matches mine perfectly. But you must take stock of the fact that she prefers a dildo that fits her vagina. Further, to you guys in the back, the average vagina is only 6 inches in depth.

This is how Sarah answered the same question,

“The dildo has a lot to compete wi… Actually no, the dildo can’t compete. There are just too many things a dildo can’t make up for, size is about the only thing. No, wait, it can vibrate, but then so can my partner’s penis with a vibrating cock ring, so the advantage is lost anyways.

Size and shape don’t matter too much to me in regards to my partner, the extremes can be compensated for, and usage is usually what makes the big difference anyways. With a dildo, I can control size and shape, but there the user needs to be compensated for…. “

Again, another female says that the size of the dildo doesn’t matter when comparing that to an actual penis.

What the Professionals Say About Women’s Satisfaction and Their Partner’s Penis Size

In asking the question, “Do women prefer their sex toys (dildos) larger than their partner?” you must put things into perspective in regard to penis size. Why? Because the original question was posed by a male and likely because he was concerned over his penis size as compared to a sex toy.

A study that was published in the British Journal of Urology found that 85% of women were satisfied with the size of their partner’s penis. Furthermore, 45% of the same women’s male counterparts admitted that they felt their penis was too small. So, to put it in simple terms, 85% of women are perfectly content with a man’s penis size. And, with that being the case, the likelihood that she would choose a dildo larger than her mate, is pretty low. But let’s dive deeper and look at another question that was asked by a gentleman.

Can a Woman, Who Uses a Dildo, Bigger Than Her Partner’s Penis, Get So Used to that Size that She Starts to Feel Unsatisfied by Him and His Penis?

Do women prefer their sex toys (dildos) larger than their partner? Photo of 3 skin toned colors of the Dirk dildo made by Real Doll
The ultra-realistic RealCock from Real Doll; Dirk

This particular question made me squint my eyes and massage my temples. That is because I don’t think some people realize just how elastic a women’s vagina is. Unless a woman is walking around with a massive dildo crammed into her twat 24/7, the elasticity of her vagina will not change.

So, if a woman is using a very large dildo for masturbation, it will have no effect on the ability of a smaller penis to fulfill her. Vaginas are built to stretch and snap right back into shape.

What People Are Saying

I dug through Quora and found some interesting answers to this question, which was posted by an anonymous source. For instance, this first answer, I must add, is not the norm. Obviously, it was written by a male in a dominant and submissive relationship and thus doesn’t represent the average couple. Nevertheless, it’s important to see things from this perspective.

Anonymous has this to say,

“I would say some women do and I would say that some women might switch to prefer it. My wife and I met in high school and got married right after. Anyway, as I got older my body sort of had a rubber effect. I was 6’0″ tall, 180 lbs. wore a size 12 shoe, and my penis was 6 inches long and about 1.6 inches in diameter. As I became older my diet changed, and I became very depressed and stressed out. Things were getting bad. When I finally came out of it I am now 29. I am 5’11″, 188 lbs., wear a size 11 shoe and my penis barely reaches 4.5 inches erect and 1.38 inches in diameter.”

“So, my wife and I decided to try having fun. We bought a dildo that was a bit bigger than me and she didn’t really like it. However, after some foreplay and blindfolds, she began to like it but it was really a hit-and-miss as to if she could orgasm. So, to really get into it we decided to eliminate distractions. So I wore a cock cage and, also got into small penis humiliation, and I wore a large strap on. Her orgasms became a bit more frequent. We decided to go even bigger and got a 9-inch-long (7 inches insertable) dual density dildo that was 1.75 inches in diameter. She loved it and would orgasm intensively every time.”

“After several months she let me out of my cage and wanted to use my penis. I put it in her and began thrusting. She looked at me with no expression. The kissing, the love, the romance, and the passion were all still there but she was unfazed by what was happening between her legs. We tried for several more days and still nothing. She put the cage back on me and we went back to toys. I get let out every now and then and if I do get allowed to penetrate her it is only anal. She consistently teases me with her vagina and has not been traditionally in it for a couple of years. I have actually grown to enjoy it.”

More Perspectives

This is what Alice said in regard to the question,

“Ok… So, I have a slight preference for… Ah-hem… Larger sizes, at least when it comes to toys. Point is, (penetrative) sex with a partner is not about size. Sure, the sensation is slightly different, bus sex with a partner is interaction. The only time when I have had size-related problems with a partner is when a guy (who was not by far the smallest I have been in bed with) got a bout of insecurity and ended up being crap at penetration because of that. He left me unsatisfied because he was so unsure that he took the play out of penetration, not because he was smaller than one of my toys. He didn’t want me to play, all he wanted to do is show me that he could satisfy me with his penis only. Pity I do not come that way: not with men, not with toys. So, what size is really important when it comes to sex? Not the penis’s, the brain’s!”

And finally, Sushita says,

“Yes… Don’t go for a bigger dildo… prefer a similar size of his penis.”

Do women prefer their sex toys to be larger than their partner? Colorful wheel created by using Lovehoney sex toys
Sex Toys Spiral of sex toys sold by Lovehoney

What the Professionals Are Saying About Dildo Sizes and Buying Habits

It’s plain to see that when the question “Do women prefer sex toys (dildos) larger than their partners?” is asked, most women say that an average size dildo is what they prefer. However, there is a tremendous amount of proof out there to back this up.

John Millward, a professional in compiling analytics, was presented with 4.5 million sex toy sales from Lovehoney, one of the largest sex toy retailers in the world. He was tasked with digging deep into the information and compiling statistics on who bought what, the sizes, shapes, and colors, and, in regard to this article, the sizes of dildos.

The entire article is absolutely fascinating and does show that women prefer smaller dildos, especially in comparison to the size of dildos preferred by men. Therefore, Lovehoney shoppers preferred all sorts of dildo sizes but the females preferred dildos that were smaller.

Do women prefer their sex toys be larger than their partners. Graph of dildo sales grouped by size and gender.
Graph of dildo purchases by size and gender

Do Women Really Prefer Dildos that Are Larger than Their Partner’s Penis? The Final Breakdown

In the end, do women prefer sex toys (dildos) larger than their partners? In the majority of cases, the answer is no. Honestly, I do not believe, when shopping for a sex toy, a woman consciously thinks to herself, “Hmmm, this one is definitely bigger than my man, so put that baby in my cart!”

However, since it is more difficult for women to climax while using a penetrative sex toy, she may opt for something a little bigger simply to be able to feel it more intensely. And that is in the case of masturbation. But, if we are looking solely at using a dildo as a couple, I don’t believe any woman would prefer a dildo over her mate let alone one larger than his penis.

After all, sex is way more about the person attached to the penis than it is about the penis itself. And since dildos are inanimate objects, they just don’t feel the same nor do they give us nearly the pleasure a real penis does.

So, to my male readers, her choice of dildo size has absolutely nothing to do with you and everything to do with the fact that it takes a whole lot more dildo to pleasure us than it does an actual penis. Your size is perfect for us!