What Size Dildo Should I Buy?

When looking for the dildo of your dreams, you want a shaft that fills you up nicely without being overwhelming — the perfect balance of stimulation and comfort.

Maybe you are shopping for your first dildo, or maybe you are ready for a little more in the size department — whatever your needs, size does matter when it comes to dildo shopping!

Shopping online for sex toys is quick, convenient, and discreet, but it does make it tricky to judge the size of your new purchase.

Photos are helpful, but looks can be deceiving — I’m not one for conspiracy theories, but I’m sure some sites use hand models with massive hands just to mess with us!

Not to mention, every shop seems to use different measurement conventions!

The last thing you want is to get your brand new dildo in the post only to find out you’ve ordered the wrong size, so we’re here to make sure that doesn’t happen.

Different Measurements

Understanding how different brands and webshops measure dildos is the first step in finding your perfect match. Here are the ones you need to know:

  • Length: This usually refers to the total length of the dildo, including the base and balls (if there are any).
  • Insertable length: This is the measurement of the shaft (the part that will be inside you) sans balls and base.
  • Diameter: This is the width of the shaft if you measure from one side to the other.
  • Circumference of girth: This is the measurement around the outside of the shaft.

Some shops, like Lovehoney, list the circumference, whereas others, like Spectrum Boutique or TooTimid, list the diameter.

It’s important to check which measurement is used so you don’t end up with more or less than you bargained for in the width department!

Also, make sure to check the measurements in the specifications, and don’t only go on what’s in the title — a title that says a 9-inch dildo might only have an insertable length of 6.5 inches!

Here at Bedbible, we are team diameter as we think it’s easier to picture what a 2-inch wide shaft looks like than trying to imagine 6.28 inches around.

What Size Dildo Is Right For Me?

Diameter (or circumference or girth — whichever makes the most sense to you) is the most important measurement, as this will determine how easy your dildo is to insert, how full it makes you feel, and the intensity of the stimulation.

The insertable length is also important, but you can control how much of the shaft you want to insert, so I recommend starting by selecting a dildo with your desired diameter.

Tips for Picking the Right Diameter

  • Think about a penis you enjoyed having sex with in the past — roughly what size was it?
  • Use your fingers to try out different widths
  • If you already own a dildo or insertable sex toy, check the measurement of that and then decide whether you want something bigger or smaller

Choosing a Size Based on Experience

If you are unsure where to start, I’ve put together a general guideline of what to look for based on your level of experience. However, it is important to remember that all bodies are different so these guidelines are only a rough estimate.

Another thing to consider is how you are going to use the dildo. If your dildo is for anal use, you’ll probably want to err on the side of caution when it comes to size and go for something smaller as the anus doesn’t stretch as easily as the vagina.

Level of ExperienceDiameterLength
No experience of penetration (with a dildo or penis)< 1inch< 5 inches
Beginner 1 – 1.5 inches5 – 6 inches
Intermediate1.5 – 2 inches 6 – 8 inches
Advanced2 – 2.5 inches8 – 10 inches
Size Kings and Queens> 2.5 inches > 10 inches

Some Last Things to Consider When Choosing your Dildo

  • The bigger the size, the more intense the textural details will feel
  • The bigger the dildo, the softer you’ll want it to be
  • If you plan on using your dildo in a harness for strap-on play, you’ll want to go a little up in length.

    Now you are armed with the knowledge you need to dildo shop with confidence! And if you’ve already ordered the wrong size by mistake, don’t throw it out just yet! Check out this great advice on what to do if your dildo is too big.