If you’re wondering how to get the most out of using a strap on, then you’ve come to the right place!
In this guide, we’ll look at everything you need to know, including how to use one, the best ways to use one, the best materials, and some of the best beginner strap ons on the market.
We’ll also look at our top tips for making your experience the best it can be!
Top tips for using a strap on
#1 Getting started
First time use can often feel overwhelming, especially if you’re not used to being a penetrator! So, we’ve compiled some tips to ease you into it (pun intended):
- Communication- what do yourself and your partner want from the experience? (power play, role-play, dual orgasms etc.)
- Wearing it around- wearing it around the house, and practicing your thrusting motions beforehand can help with feeling comfortable
- Lube, glorious lube- thoroughly lubricate before penetration- trust us, don’t skimp on the lube!
#2 Better strap-on sex
Positions– try different positions to decide what you and your partner like (missionary, doggy, cowgirl, 69 etc.)
Type of sex– using a strap on doesn’t always have to center around penetration; try stimulating the clitoris/labia/around the anus with it
Incorporate a bullet vibrator– some harnesses have a pocket where a bullet vibrator can be inserted for the wearer’s pleasure; if this spikes your interest, definitely make use of it!
Orgasm doesn’t have to be the main goal– we often put pressure on ourselves to orgasm which isn’t fun at all! Remember that the main thing is to have fun, enjoy yourself, and explore yourself and your parnter’s desires.
What Can You Use Strap Ons For?
So who can use strap ons and on whom?
Well, anyone who wants to can use them on anybody who wants to, really. Strap-ons are for unisex use, and anybody with the desire to play around with this fun attachment CAN!
Whether you’re a vulva-owner, penis-owner, or something in between, a strap on dildo can actually help you experience giving or receiving penetrative sex without an erect penis at your disposal!
This way, strap ons are a great tool for…
- Pegging
- Gender affirmation
- Eretile dysfunction
- Double penetration
- Simulating oral sex
They are great for both vaginal and anal penetration and stimulation.
Curved dildos attached to your strap on harness are then great for stimulating g-spots in vaginas. Or for prostate stimulation during anal penetration of penis owners (also known as “pegging”).
Different couples’ constellations call for different types of strap ons with different features and designs.
Tips For Using a Strap On!
These attachable phallic wonders are good for vaginal, anal, and even oral fun. Depending on what you are looking to explore with your partner, there might be some things to consider while using these types of toys:
- Comfort – Always make sure the person receiving is comfortable with the sensations you are imparting as the giver. It can be difficult to know what the other person is feeling, so don’t hesitate to check in with each other along the way. Make sure everyone is always having a good time!
- Positions – Depending on what type of penetrative sex you are looking to plore with your partner, consider which positions are best for strap on sex. it is always a good idea to find a few good positions to start in. Even if you’re experienced or a beginner, using these devices can sometimes be tricky. The key is to start out with positions that create stability and control over the thrusting. Start slow and communicate about what is happening!
How to use a strap on correctly
A strap on harness secures around the hips and holds a strap on dildo using an O-ring; strap on underwear has an O-ring in the front which a attaches to.
Lets get it on!
- First things first, attach your strap on dildo to the O-ring in the harness (this is easier than trying to do it while wearing the harness)
- You can step into your harness as you would step into a thong or a pair of underwear
- If your harness is too tight as it hasn’t been adjusted, loosen the straps and pull the harness over your bum and hips
- Once the harness is resting on your hips loosely, you can adjust it to fit comfortably but securely
- Your harness should fit like a tight fitting pair of jeans, and secure your strap on dildo without a sag
How does it feel?
Before using your strap on and harness during sex, you should wear it around the house to make sure it is comfortable; does it fall down or sag?
If so, the harness is too loose or the strap on dildo is too heavy. This can be easily remedied by tightening the straps of your harness.
You look great!
Lots of people feel self-concious when wearing a strap on for the first time and this is completely normal! If you’re excited to wear and use a strap on, then you should embrace how you look whilst wearing it.
Try wearing the strap on alone and looking at yourself in the mirror wearing it.
Lube, lube, and more lube
Whatever you’re using your strap on for, take it slow at first and use plenty of water-based lube; this will ease insertion and removal and increase the pleasure of the receiver!
How to use a strapless strap on
The strapless strap on includes a shorter end which is held inside the vagina, while the longer shaft penetrates. Using one of these pleasurable, but tricky toys, is a learning curve!
Check out our dedicated guide on how to use a strapless strap on for a more in-depth look.
Size
As a wearer, one end will be inserted into your vagina and so you will need to be comfortable and able to hold it inside of you during sex.
Do kegels
You’ll need to have strong vaginal walls to hold one of these beauties inside of you during sex; strengthening the vaginal wall muscles with kegels can also intensify orgasms- its a win-win!
Be patient
Don’t be discouraged because you couldn’t use the it the first time!
It can take time to strengthen the vaginal walls and to get into the groove of using a this type of toy!
Use a harness
Thats right! If you’re keen on the design of the strapless strap on, lots of harness O-rings are compatible to fit these toys as they have openings for them to go through.
How to use a hollow strap on
A hollow strap on has hollow base that allows a penis to sit inside of it- they’re great for adding length or for those with erectile problems.
Lube it up!
This is a really important part of wearing a hollow dildo as your penis is going inside of it; ensure your penis and the canal of the toy is sufficiently lubed up for comfort and ease.
Putting it on
Wearing a hollow strap on is a lot like wearing a regular one, however the wearer’s penis is going inside.
Put your harness on loosely, and whether erect or not, you can put your penis into the hollow center.
Adjust the harness to comfortably and securely fit around your hips and bum. Now you can go for as long as you please!
The best starter strap ons (tried and tested!)
Beginner underwear
Strap on underwear is super easy to use, whether using with a dildo or as a packer. The Lovehoney Double Up Kit is perfect for beginners.
Beginner strapless strap on
Learning curve included, The Union by WetForHer is great for beginners and includes a bullet vibrator for optional vibrations.
Beginner hollow
Though they might sound a little complicated, the Doc Johnson Silicone Hollow Strap-on Kit has everything you need and more, to ensure your experience is as smooth as ever.
Beginner harness
A good beginner strap on harness kit will have everything you need to start your journey; the Tracey Cox Supersex Strap-on Kit includes two different sized and textured shafts, a bullet vibrator and an adjustable harness.
The best materials
The best material for any sex toy is usually silicone as it is body-safe and can vary in levels of flexibility, however this doesn’t suit everyone as some people prefer soft materials for realism while some desire rigidity for pin-point pleasure; of course, the ideal material for any sex toy will be body-safe, however not all materials are:
- Silicone- flexible/rigid depending on type of silicone, body-safe, non-porous, clean with ease, use with water-based lube (not silicone-based lube).
- PVC- flexible, not body-safe, porous, can be difficult to clean, can be used with any lube.
- TPE- flexible (mainly used for realism due to texture), not body-safe, porous, difficult to clean and maintain, can be used with any lube.
- Jelly- very flexible, not body-safe, porous, difficult to clean and maintain, any lube is suitable.
- Glass- completely rigid, body-safe, non-porous, easy to clean and maintain, can be used with an lube, great for temperature play.
- Metal- completely rigid, body-safe, non-porous, easy to clean, any lube is suitable, great for temperature play.
- Wood- rigid, not body-safe, porous, difficult to clean and maintain, any lube is suitable.
What is a strap on?
A strap on dildo attaches to a harness or strap on underwear. This is used to penetrate another person’s vagina, anus, or mouth. They come in all different shapes, sizes, colors, textures, and aesthetics which is what makes them great, versatile sex toys.
Starter strap ons are perfect for beginners as they are especially designed for delving into the world of strap on sex! If you’re looking for a place to buy the strapons. Then take a look at this shop.
Why do people use them?
There are several reasons why people choose to incorporate these sex toys into their sex lives- and all reasons are valid! Some of the most common reasons are:
- vagina/vagina relationships
- dysphoria/packers
- power play
- pegging
- erectile dysfunction
- double penetration
What is a Strap On Actually?
Okay, let’s cover the basics! Basically, a strap on is a wearable dildo. Fastened to a harness on the lower body of the wearer. This can give you the option to play around with penetration and thrusting without having a penis! Complete penis free and hands free penetrative sex!
You can buy strap ons as a kit with everything included. Or buy the elements separately. You can pick out your preferred type of harness. Just make sure it’s compatible with your dildo of choice.
Some strap ons secure the dildo to the harness with an O-ring fastening. But strap ons with a vac-u-lock are also a good alternative for ultra secure fastening!
Get the right fit for you! Here, we have selected some of the best plus size strap on harnesses out there!
There are different types of harnesses in different kinds of material. Mostly body safe materials, such as leather, nylon, soft plastics, or thick cotton. Leather harnesses are a popular choice as they often don’t chafe, have breathable and adjustable designs. They also just look really cool! Also, underwear harnesses are less supportive but provide a more comfortable and natural feel.
Types of Strap Ons
Although there are many different types of strap ons out there, I’ll just briefly take you through some of highlights!
Vibrating
Vibrating strap ons are usually made by including a vibrating element (like small bullet vibrator) within the product. This Tracey Cox strap-on, for example, has space for a small bullet inside the dildo. Other types make room for them on the inside of the harness to create some clitoral stimulation for the wearer.
The ones with some sort of built-in vibrating element also ripples out into the shaft, stimulating the receiver simultaneously!
Strapless
Strapless strap ons are designed for vulva-owners to have some dual stimulation harness free fun!
This type of toy, like the Desire Luxury Strapless Strap On, is secured by inserting a bulbed pony into the wearers vagina. The pony will move with every thrust and stimulate their g-spot (and will often include an element that stimulates the clitoris as well) thus providing ultimate pleasure for both parties involved and for several different erogenous zones!
Learn more about how to use a strapless strap on and find out if these strapless contraptions actually do work or not!
Hollow
Hollow strap ons are designed for penis-owners who would like to wear a strap-on sleeve around their penis to create a sizeable and firm extention of their member. This Doc Johnson Silicone Hollow Strap-On Kit comes with 4 different hollow dildos for different sizes and functions!
Hollows are also often used by people with erectile dysfunction or ejaculation problems.
Double Penetration
Double penetration strap ons are the ultimate treat for couples who want to fill two holes with one thrust! This Menage A Trois For Two Strap On from Sportsheets allows you to do just that!
Some of these toys are designed both for people with or without a penis. Simply use your own penis and attach a dildo underneath or use two different kinds of dildo for a varied penetrative double-stuffed experience!
There are also a few different variations of the classic strap on that might be of interest to you:
- Realistic strap ons are great if you want to create a realistic look and feel for both you and your partner. Ideal for gender affirmation or if you simply prefer a life-like aesthetic.
- Large strap ons are also a category in themselves! Looking for extra large fulfillment with your strap activities? These monstrosities will take you there!
- On the other side that spectrum we have thin strap ons. Slim and sleek, these dildos are perfect for strap on beginners, first time peggers, and also double penetration!
SpareParts Joque — Test & Review
Check out our own test and review of this SpareParts Joque strap-on harness!
This harness is compatible with dildos up to 2 inches in diameter with a flexible O-ring fastening.
Pockets on the inside of the harness make room for you to insert your own bullet vibrator to add to the fun!
Cleaning & Care
Check out our blog post on how to clean a strap-on properly! Here’s the short version:
The Dildo
Cleaning your dildo depends on its material. Most dildos are mode of body safe non-porous materials like silicone, glass, steel, or ABS plastic. Clean them with a mild soap and warm water or with any sex toy cleaner.
If the dildo you’re using has some form of internal vibrator, be sure to check how waterproof the product is before submerging it!
The Harness
Cleaning the harness itself also depends largely on the material.
Wipe down your leather og vinyl with mild soap and water. Thick cotton and nylon harnesses go in the washing machine!
Remember to clean your toys straight after use to avoid them drying out and making them even harder to clean. Once clean and dry, be sure to store your dildo and harness correctly. Protect them from lint and dust until your next strappy adventure!