Whether you are a sex toy newbie or just haven’t purchased a sex toy in a while, there are always concerns when buying sex toys. For example, is the sex toy site you’re buying from on the up-and-up? Or, will my sex toys make me sick? So, I have gathered the biggest concerns when buying sex toys and am sharing tips on how to address those concerns.
#1 Sex Toys Concern: Will Sex Toys Change My Relationship?
One of the biggest concerns buying sex toys is if it will somehow change your relationship. And yes, that is a valid concern for many reasons. So, here are a few of the relationship problems sex toys may trigger.
Am I Being Replaced by a Sex Toy?
Men, in particular, may feel as if they are being replaced by a sex toy. This can spur feelings of low-self esteem and lack of confidence between the sheets. Therefore, it’s important to reassure your partner that they DO satisfy all of your sexual needs and desires and using sex toys is the icing on the cake, enhancing his (or her) rock-star sexual abilities.
Will My Significant Other Think I’m a Freak?
Worrying that your new boyfriend or girlfriend might think you’re a freak because you use sex toys? Trust me, you are not alone! However, what you do in your solo time is none of their business in the beginning. Imagine meeting that hot girl you swiped right on: “Hi, I’m John! I have an inflatable lover at home. Hope that doesn’t bother you!”
In reality, you should save the sex toy talks for later, after you’ve learned their favorite ice cream, movies and religion. Once you decide to become intimate, then you can openly discuss your use of sex toys, adding that you used them as a replacement for sleeping around. That will breach the subject matter and give you brownie points too!
My Lover Wants to Use Sex Toys All the Time!
If your lover insists on dragging out the vibrators, handcuffs, whips and butt plugs every time you are intimate, there many be a problem. The over reliance on sex toys could mean that your partner may have a sexual addiction, in which case, they should seek counseling. Or, most likely, they don’t feel confident in their sexual skills.
Therefore, if your biggest sex toy concern is over-use, the best thing to do is sit down (outside the bedroom) and have a heart-to-heart discussion. Further, reassure your lover that you enjoy their body and what they do to you. Finally, let them know that you’d enjoy having sex with them alone, leaving all of the gadgets and sex toys in the night stand drawer.
#2 Sex Toys Concern: Will Sex Toys Make Me Sick?
Another sex toys concern is whether or not your sex toys will make you sick. To be honest, that is an important concern as the sex toy industry is not overseen nor controlled for safety purposes. Hence, you can buy sex toys made from toxic materials, sex toys that can cause allergic reactions or toys that can spread infection easily.
Toxic Sex Toy Materials
There are 3 things to look out for when it comes to toxic sex toy materials. First, some sex toy materials contain toxins that can directly affect your sexual health and fertility. For example, sex toys made of rubber, rubber and plastic mixes, skin-type materials and jelly substances can contain phthalates, which cause lowered sperm counts and infertility.
Second, many people have allergies to some substances, particularly latex, which is often used when making rubber or rubber mixture toys. And third, sex toys made of porous materials can harbor viruses and bacteria and cause urinary tract infections, sexually transmitted illness and yeast infections. Read further to learn what to look for when buying safe sex toys.
Buyer Beware! Sex Toy Fakes
Buyer beware! There are sex toy dealers on the web peddling sex toys marked as safe when they’re not. Unfortunately, as mentioned above, there is no oversight when it comes to sex toys and what they’re made of. So, be sure and order from a reputable company or visit an adult shop in person.
Safe Sex Toys; What to Look for
If you have already ordered a sex toy and aren’t sure if it’s safe, one sure way to find out is by smelling the product. Any strong chemical smell means that your sex toy contains dangerous chemicals and should be thrown away. So, how can you be sure you are getting a safe sex toy before you buy? Look for the following things:
- Look for retailers that offer warranties
- Read the product description thoroughly. If there isn’t one, that should be a hard pass!
- Look for sex toys that are phthalate-free, latex-free and body-safe
- Purchase sex toys made from silicone, hard plastic, glass, stainless steel and wood.
- You get what you pay for. Skip the cheap toys and grab quality sex toys on sale.
#3 Sex Toys Concern: Do Sex Toys Spread Infections?
Another huge sex toys concern is whether or not they can spread infections. Unfortunately, all sex toys can spread infection, even high-end, luxury sex toys made of silicone, glass and other non-porous materials. Therefore, you should always heed the sex toy no-no’s and practice proper cleansing and storage of your adult playthings.
Sex Toy No-No’s
There are several sex toy no-no’s that every adult toy owner should follow. First and foremost, never share your sex toys with others. However, if you do, treat your toy as if it’s your vagina or penis and use a condom. Secondly, never, ever use a sex toy on your vagina and bottom. Either have separate toys for each entrance or clean thoroughly in between uses.
The reason for this is that you carry e-coli and other bacteria around your bottom and these nasty little bacteria can cause painful urinary tract infections and raging bacterial vaginosis (better known as fishy-vag). Third, how you clean your toys is important as some methods can break down the surface of your sex toy causing small tears and pores that harbor bacteria.
How to Properly Care for Your Sex Toys
Knowing how to properly care for your plaything can be one of the biggest concerns when buying sex toys. Therefore, I am going to share my tips for caring for your sex toys so that you can protect your genital health and maintain your sex toys for a longer period of time.
How to Clean Your Sex Toys
Most all sex toys can be cleaned using soap and warm water. For example, using dishwashing liquid, hand soap or liquid body wash will work just fine as long as you rinse and dry your sex toy well. Additionally, there are several sex toy cleansers on the market that you can use. And again, just be sure and rinse your toy well and dry it thoroughly before storing.
How to Store Your Sex Toys
As much as we want to toss our sex toys aside, roll over and fall asleep after achieving that big-o, that’s not the best idea (think carpet fibers, dirt and pet hair stuck to your vibrator, yuck!) So, after cleansing and drying your sex toy, tuck it away in a cool, dry place. More importantly, be sure your sex toys aren’t touching one another as some materials will bleed color onto others.
Shocking Dangers: How to Clean Your Rechargeable Sex Toys
Cleaning rechargeable sex toys can be a shocking experience, literally. Because they are recharged via an electrical connection, not only could you get an electrical shock, the toy itself can become a fire hazard. Therefore, it’s crucial that you clean your rechargeable sex toys with the utmost of care.
So, unless the sex toy is marked “fully submersible”, only wash the outside of the sex toy, avoiding the charging area, which you can wipe down with a soapy cloth. Then, be sure and dry your rechargeable sex toy completely before plugging it in. Not only will it keep your toy from spreading infection, it wipes out the sex toy concern of causing a fire.
#4 Sex Toys Concern: Using the Right Lubricant
The 4th sex toys concern is whether or not you are choosing the right lubricant. Because sex toys are made from so many different types of materials, you should be concerned about the possibility that your lubricant can damage the toy. Therefore, you should pair your lubricant with not only the type of sexual activity but the material from which the toy is made.
Types of Lubricants
Sex toy lubricants come in all sorts of types nowadays which does pose a concern when buying sex toys and lubricants. A rule of thumb is that water-based lubricants are safe for all sex toy materials as well as condoms. So, you can never go wrong when buying a water-based lubricant.
However, if you need a lubricant that is thicker, lasts a bit longer or you are looking for an all-natural lubricant you have to be careful when using sex toys. The reason for this is that some materials will dissolve and break down when exposed to oil-based and silicone-based lubricants. But which sex toys need special lubricants? Read on….
Which Sex Toys Need Special Lubricants?
The best, high-end, luxury sex toys are made from silicone and silicone mixtures. Unfortunately, silicone sex toys can only be used with water-based lubricants. Even if you see a lubricant maker claiming their product is safe for silicone toys, do not believe it. So, save the oil and silicone-based lubricants for your glass, steel and hard plastic toys and only use water-based lube on your silicone toys.
#5 Sex Toys Concern: Sex Toy Injuries
Ever since the release of the “50 Shades” books and movies, emergency rooms around the country have seen an uptick in sex toy related injuries. Therefore, injuries are another of our important sex toy concerns. So, before you get something stuck and end up being the highlight of the ER staff’s day, check out the following tips for safe sex toy play.
Don’t Get Stuck
Not everyone likes butt-play, but for those who do, heed this warning; never put anything up your bum that doesn’t have a safety rim to keep the toy from sliding deep inside you. For instance, butt plugs and other anal toys are shaped to stay put and have a base that stops it from getting lost. So, always use sex toys specifically made for bottom play.
Avoid Numb Naughty Bits
Sure, that new vibrator feels amazing against your naughty bits and who doesn’t love the Heavenly feeling of multiple O’s? But be careful, those buzzing vibrations can cause nerve damage and result in temporary numbness. And the last thing you want to do is lose sensation down there! So, masturbate away, but do so with a break in between.
Plus, you can shop for vibrating playthings that have a low-frequency rumble, rather than a buzz, which will not give you a numb clitoris. Check out Screaming O’s exclusive Vooom vibrating sex toys for low-pitch rumbles and no numb hoo-ha.
Ringing Your Wiener
Cock rings are one of the best sex toys for couples. They are super inexpensive and allow him to have a larger, more firm erection, make him much more sensitive and delay ejaculation, making sex last longer for you both. However, there is a big sex toy concern when it comes to ringing your wiener; loss of blood flow.
So, follow instructions and never wear a cock ring for more than 20-30 minutes and always remove the ring after being intimate. Additionally, be sure and use lubricant between the skin of the penis and the cock ring to avoid hair getting stuck under the ring or the ring getting stuck on the penis. The last thing you want is your partner coming at you with scissors for an emergent cock ring removal.
#6 Sex Toys Concern: What if My Sex Toy Breaks?
Our 6th and final sex toys concern is what if your sex toy breaks. And, I get it, sex toys aren’t cheap and to have a malfunction on the verge of a much-needed solo session, is a travesty. So, what should you do if your sex toy breaks? Follow my quick tips below and hopefully, if you find yourself with a clunker clitoral stimulator, you won’t be out big bucks.
You Get What You Pay for
I cannot stress this sex toy concern enough; you get what you pay for. Cheap sex toys can not only contain harmful chemicals and be made of shoddy materials, they can have cheaply made parts and motors that burn out quickly. So, avoid those super-cheap toys and go for quality. Additionally, you can look for sex toy retailers that have superior products and great sales.
Sex Toys with Warranties
While most sex toy sellers will not accept returns under any circumstance, some actually do have warranties on their products. Therefore, before you start throwing sex toys into your virtual cart, read the retailer’s return policy to see under what conditions they accept returns. Some great sex toy retailers to check out online are Lelo, The Screaming O and Lovehoney.
What’s Your Biggest Concern Buying Sex Toys?
Everyone has concerns when buying sex toys as well as concerns when using sex toys. It’s my hope that I have covered some of your biggest concerns and have given you the advice and tips you need to calm those worries. If not, I would love to hear from you! Click that link, go to our Facebook page or comment to share with me your biggest concerns when it comes to sex toys. Who knows, your question may be my next Bed Bible blog post.